The Birth of Danger Mouse
by Winter Winks 221
Summary: Just a oneshot inspired by Danger Mouse's birth on Mt. Everest and how he subsequently conquered the mountain. Source material was used (link in story) but I did use a bit of creative liberty as well. I hope you all enjoy, and please feel free to leave feedback! :)


The Birth of Danger Mouse

A/N: Characters don't belong to me.

….

Colonel Cutt-Pryce hummed thoughtfully to himself as he gnawed on his pipe stem; exhilaration coursing through his veins at the mere sight of the 22,000 feet of Mt. Everest they had conquered; and they were nearing the end of day 3 of their expedition.

"At last!" he grunted contentedly, "Achieving a boy's dream at the young age of 60. This will be the most memorable expedition of my life!" He continued to stare down the mountain until it grew too dark to see. He was disgruntled that it was too damn cold and windy to light his pipe for a puff; but the old guinea pig was pleased to see his old friend and expedition navigator, U.L. Tyde, a hardy, slightly plump rat of 52 years of age, trotting up the hill behind him.

"Ah, U.L.!" He greeted cheerfully, as his companion approached. "How are we for time?"

"We'll be reaching the base for Camp 3 in fifteen minutes." U.L. answered, examining his pocket watch- or trying to, anyway. It looked as though it needed winding up, anyway.

"Excellent!" The guinea pig roared in delight, clapping his meaty paws together. "How's your leg, old friend?" He asked, gesturing to his friend's Chippendale wooden leg. "It wouldn't impede you, would it?"

"Oh aye, I'll manage, old chum." U.L. replied, hardly fazed about facing one of the world's biggest mountains with a false leg. He patted said false ligament fondly before continuing, "In all honesty, Cutt-Pryce, it's my niece I'm more worried about. I know she is a very capable and headstrong young lady, - it's just I fear for her health, especially if she has the baby now"-

"I love you, uncle, but I wish you wouldn't fuss so!" A new voice, this one female, chimed in and a young, heavily pregnant female mouse- swaddled in thick layers of mountain gear, which was padded with yak and mountain sheep wool- tottered up the hill behind the two old friends, tenderly cradling her belly with her gloved hands. "I'll be fine. If the baby's born at Camp 3, I can keep him warm and dry." She reasoned.

"Yes, but what of after?" Pressed U.L. Tyde, gently. "My dear Marion, I admire your determination in coming with us on this expedition, but perhaps it had been better if you had waited until after you had the baby"-

"Then I'd be receiving comments about 'losing the baby weight, are we?', Uncle U.L.!" Protested Marion, her hands still curved round her belly, as though she feared her unborn baby would take offence. "Besides, how could I pass up such an incredible opportunity like this?"

"It'll get rough from here, as I was telling U.L." Warned the Colonel, his monocle steaming up with the icy cold blast of air whistling around them. Removing the offending eyewear to polish it on his sleeve, he continued, matter-of-factly, "It might be wise to have the good doctor aid you back down the mountain after your son is born, Mrs. Mouse."

"Nonsense!" Scoffed Marion, hotly. "I pledged I will take on this hike- and you will not dare stop me, Colonel, just because of my natural state!"

Both men were stunned into silence, each giving each other a look. The Colonel, although married, had no idea how to handle such a feisty, headstrong young woman as Marion Violette Mouse. U.L. had never married, but he, though normally able to reason with his niece, now found himself at a loss for words.

Dear God, what would he tell Terry? His wife was bonkers?

… well, she was, he conceded to himself- but she and her parents both proved themselves to be very hot tempered.

"Good evening, gentlemen." A fourth voice suddenly cut in interrupting him from his thoughts. The voice belonged to a St. Bernard, with a first aid kit secured around his collar.

"Ah, good evening, doctor." Replied U.L, wringing his paws at the giant dog. "I thought you were with my niece."

"I was, Mr. Tyde- she slipped out of my sight." Dr. Thyme Out replied dryly. U.L. shot Marion a cross look, which she only encountered with a goofy expression- eyes crossed, tongue poking out of her mouth. It was her defence mechanism- whenever she was in trouble for anything, she would always pull silly faces in the hopes of getting power over figures of authority through laughter.

Her reasoning? Tears were for telling grown ups they won.

…

"As far as I can see, however, she is fortunately very fit and able to continue the expedition for the time being." Continued Dr. Out reasonably, casting a cursory glance at Marion. "I have, however, warned her to take things easy tonight- the chances of the baby coming before dawn are very likely."

"She'll be alright when the baby comes?" The fretful rat asked, his paw resting on Marion's back.

"I can't guarantee that for certain- but she's within minimum risk. She's taken all precautions to prevent anything going wrong. If something happens, it's out of our hands." Dr. Out replied, with a dog-shrug. "Of course, I will do will everything I can to help her."

"And I'm certain everything will be fine." Marion added confidently to her adoptive uncle. "And now, we best get to Camp 3, Colonel." She added briskly, before U.L. could express further concern for her safety and wellbeing.

"Quite right, young, lady. Lead on, U.L!" Colonel Cutt-Pryce replied. "U.L. my dear fellow," he called out, shooting an apologetic glance in Marion's direction as he did so. "would you care to lift our spirits?"

"My pleasure, sir!" Replied U.L, cheerfully, and he began singing a cheerful rendition of 'O' She'll Be Coming Around the Mountain When She Comes,' oblivious to the scuffles behind him as everyone within earshot attempted to block their ears as quickly as possible. Fortunately for them, the Sherpas had anticipated such a horrible fate, and brought yak wool earplugs for everyone- Marion, Dr. Out and Col. Cutt Pryce included.

"Ah, that's much better!" Boomed the Colonel gratefully.

He was fond of U.L.- hardworking, kind, collected and logical in contrast to the Colonel's emotional drive towards life- he was overall a wonderful companion. Unfortunately for Cutt-Pryce, singing was something U.L. was fond of. He believed he had the voice of an angel.

Cutt-Pryce hadn't the heart to tell his best friend otherwise.

"Thank Heavens these Sherpas are so resourceful!" Marion said, sighing with relief as her beloved uncle's singing was stifled.

Feeling a gentle but impatient kick, the 25-year-old mouse cradled her rotund belly, stroking it tenderly with gloved fingers before whispering,

"Not long now, little one. Mama will see you soon." Lifting her paws to her lips, she kissed the palms gently, before placing them over the spot where she felt her son kick.

…

At last, they reached the site for Camp 3, where they found shelter in a little 'alcove' in the rock of the fierce mountain, and pitched up the tents for the Sherpas, the leader's tent and a tent for supplies- including the doctor's medical supplies, food and spare climbing gear.

Despite her wishes, a tent was swiftly set up for Marion before the other tents were pitched, so she could rest- having been made exempt from the tent-pitching process along with the good doctor, and Sherpa Fivesing. Both were on hand in case Marion unexpectedly went into labour.

…

Once the hustle and bustle died away, everyone settled in front of a meagre fire.

"What is this?!" Thundered the Colonel. "This is no fit fire to make beans on toast- what makes anyone think this is a suitable fire for the young lady!?"

"My apologies, Colonel." Said Sherpa Tensing, bowing politely. "I could not find a lot of firewood- and we lost the yak carrying what firewood we had." He added, sheepishly.

Colonel Cutt-Pryce cursed- but good old U.L. Tyde was quick to unscrew his wooden leg, saying, "Here, take my leg." Before chucking it onto the fire. It instantly blazed and flared, sending off large waves of warmth to the young mouse, trying to crouch in on herself without squishing her unborn child- it wasn't very successful, needless to say, for Marion's bump was protruding so much that attempts at curling into a foetal position herself was futile.

"Thank you, Uncle," Marion blinked in astonishment, straightening.

The Col blinked, astonished. "By thunder-blazes, man!" He roared at U.L., "why ever would you give up one leg?"

"My Marion is family- my body is not." U.L. replied simply, lighting his pipe for a smoke. "I can acquire another leg later, but my niece's safety and the wellbeing of her unborn child is my priority. My sister will never forgive me if I let Marion or her son die on this accursed night."

The Colonel took a swig of tea from his flask- it wasn't like U.L to be so dramatic.

….

Later, The Colonel was pacing round in the leader's tent, with everyone having eaten tinned sausages and Victoria Sponge cake. He sat on his camp bed and opened a bottle of sherry- just as U.L. arrived, supported by Sherpa Tensing.

"Ah, there you are, old man," he greeted, pouring sherry into two crystal glasses, "How's the rest of the expedition faring?"

"The Sherpas are settling down for rest, sir." Replied U.L. "I've asked Sherpa Tensing's half-brother, Sherpa Fivesing, to be on standby in case Dr. Out needs any help when Marion goes into labour."

"And, how is she?" the Colonel requested cordially.

"She… her waters broke two hours before, sir- not long after supper." Replied U.L. "She requested that…." He trailed off, embarrassed, on realising that the good-natured Sherpa was awkwardly hovering in the doorway- but his friend came to the rescue.

"You may join the others, Sherpa Tensing," Said the Colonel, gruffly, waving a paw in dismissal. Sherpa Tensing bowed, and murmured a respectful goodnight to the two men, before shuffling out of the tent to re-join his comrades.

"This will be a long night, my old friend, but think of what lies at the other end- your precious niece will receive the golden blessing of her child." The guinea pig reminded his navigator comfortingly, patting his friend's shoulder. The rat smiled gratefully at him.

"Where did the time go?" Muttered U.L. in disbelief. "Once a little girl, now a woman, and a mother to be."

The two men gave a short but earnest toast to Marion's health, and also to that of her child, before they each took a sip of the sherry.

"Blast!" Grunted the Colonel. "This sherry's cold! Pass the loofah, there's a good"-

Suddenly he broke off.

"Oh blow!" ejaculated Tyde. "There goes our last chance of winning the gold for that great country of ours in the three-legged race!" he patted the stump where he had removed his famed Chippendale leg mournfully.

Cutt-Pryce felt sympathetic. After all, if there was one thing his chum prided himself on besides his family, it was winning the three-legged race- after all, he was a seven and a half times champion of the 'Great Britain Three Legged 5K Marathon'.

To cheer U.L. up, he reminded him of the morrow's adventure, even throwing back the tent flap for emphasis, to illustrate how far they had yet to climb up Mt. Everest's silhouetted peaks, when, in the eerie stillness, a tiny wail drifted over the treacherous, icy peaks.

"Goodness gracious!" Exclaimed the Col., in shock. "What was that, U.L.?"

U.L., roused out of his three legged-race induced melancholy, dashed over to his friend's side to take a peek. "I can't see anything, sir."

"Good heavens…" whispered Cutt-Pryce, pointing to the mountain in awe. "… what is that tiny whale doing this far above sea level?" he pointed to

"Well, sir, according to my calculations, we're roughly between 22,000 and 22,004 ½ feet above sea level- the sea's been too rough for me to narrow my calculations any further." U.L. replied, before looking through his telescope.

What he actually found shocked him. There, trudging through the snow-covered peaks, was a mouse.

Only, it couldn't have been Marion… it was far too small, even for a mouse, to be his cherished goddaughter.

"Sir… I think… I think Marion's had her baby." He announced.

"Well, what the devil has her baby got to do with the beast on the mountain?!" Thundered his pal.

"I know this sounds ridiculous, sir… but I think the infant's climbing the mountain!" U.L. answered, panicked, shoving the telescope towards the Colonel's paws.

"Don't be ridiculous, man!" Snapped Cutt-Pryce, snatching his friend's telescope out of his paws. "Everyone knows babies can't climb mountains!" And he looked through the telescope, too.

What he saw shocked him- frightened him, even. But he daren't admit it to his best friend.

After all, even when faced with such unlikely circumstances such as these, he hated being proved wrong.

…

The next morning, after breakfast, he drew on his pipe, pondering how best to find a child with fur as white as the sparkling white snow-topped peaks around them, and return him safely to camp- and was considering summoning Fivesing to saddle up a horse so he could go and look for the disappearing delinquent, when a small voice piped up,

"May I join you, Colonel?"

The Colonel jumped.

There, shivering but triumphant, was the infant son of Marion Violette Mouse. He was already walking, talking and could remember names. Not to mention his manners were damn impeccable; more so than some grown British men he had encountered.

"Sure, lad," The Colonel replied, watching with bafflement as the child waddled in, standing there triumphantly beaming from ear to ear.

Cutt-Pryce noted the baby's ears were large- much like his mother's. His nose was also decidedly prominent, and his right eye, amber gold in colour, sparkled with liveliness, intelligence and mischievousness.

His left eye, however, was covered by a small black eyepatch.

'_Hm, birth defect, I suppose,'_ the Colonel mused to himself, looking at the boy sympathetically. 'Poor lad, he'll have to learn to live with that.'

Still, the child, with his impeccable manners, small physique and extremely advanced intelligence, made him somewhat endearing- and Cutt-Pryce normally didn't like children very much to begin with.

In fact, he didn't even look like he'd just been born- the elderly guinea pig had a hard time believing that his friend's niece had just given birth to him only twelve hours ago; despite her being on his expedition.

"That's it!" The child smiled, startling the older gentleman out of his thoughts.

"That's what, sonny?" asked Cutt-Pryce, confused.

"I planted the flag on top," Continued the little mouse brightly, oblivious to the guinea pig's bafflement, "I'm just popping down to Katmandu for a quick interview, and then I'll be back for my Mater!" And with that, he was out and long gone before the older rodent could even spring out of his chair.

He swore, wishing he and U.L. hadn't drunk all that damn sherry last night. His head was now spinning like crazy and he needed to sit down again.

'Well, if that child doesn't get himself killed, I think he'll be destined for greater things in life!' he thought to himself.

….

"Of course, I know!" Laughed Marion. "Did you think I wouldn't find out?"

The two men were dumbstruck.

"But, my dear Marion," protested Cutt-Pryce, in disbelief, "your infant son climbed to the top of that mountain- and then went down to Katmandu for a bloody interview!"

"- all before I was stitched up again!" Added Marion, glancing down at her infant son, now bundled in blankets, sound asleep. "Well, that's certainly topped all my milestones- I could spell Kanchenjunga with building blocks before I could speak!"

"Never mind that, Miss- erm, Mrs. Alton," Interrupted Cutt-Pryce. "Your baby is simply…"

"Extraordinary," finished Marion. "I'm hardly surprised, you know- Terry's family tree is more colourful than your tie, Monsieur," she winked.

"Well, I know your family is of exceptional breeding as well, my dear," added U.L. "I mean, your sisters have proven themselves to be just as exceptional as you…"

Marion thought fondly of her two older sisters- Beryl, an eccentric psychist living in Paris with her new husband, Guillaume, and Myrtle, childless and single, working at the Willesden Green Post Office as Postmistress (and the champion stamp licker of five years running.)

Now, she was the first of the Alton sisters to have a baby! She couldn't wait to return to London and show off Damian to her sisters- they would be so proud!

And Terry- dear, sweet Terry, he would be very pleased his son was born safe and well.

A/N: Well, that's my first DM fic in a while! It was written based on 'The Danger Mouse File' which I found online. Here's the link if anyone wants a look: .

Also, DM mentions having an Aunt Myrtle in an old Count Duckula comic: /Comic/Count-Duckula/Issue-5?id=139123#32


End file.
